Issues

AAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<sigh> =(

Usually I have not much to say ... but this issue really makes me mad...

the issue is “Traveling”

When I first meet Chica, I thought I found my hike partner ... when she can ski, I thought I found my ski partner ... but when I want take these actives future out of state ... I cannot bring her along.

I asked why ... and her parents’ reply is “reputation” – must keep a stainless reputation ... where a women must remain pure for the husband to be ... a very old tradition.

Ironically, they also said that their son may travel because he is a guy. A double stander ... a very old traditional & unreasonable double stander ... still in practice today.

<sigh>

There is nothing I can say to change their mind. It is their way or the highway.

If Chica was 16, it is reasonable to say you are too young. But she is not ... she is >21 ... old enough to vote ... old enough to be drafted into war ... old enough to drive ... old enough to work and own a home. And yet she will never be old enough to travel without close supervision.

Should we worry about her reputation on how she drive ... or maybe on how she work ... especially as an engineer, we produce work that will affect hundreds if not thousands of lives? Should we call all girls in the youth group who went camping overnight with the Church as sluts? For the sake of reputation, maybe it is better lock all the girls at home and wait till they get marry ... just like the old days.

<sigh>

Yes, I want to travel and I want Chica to come with ... I want to show her the world ... to let her spread her wings ... but that is hard to do with only day trips. I cannot image how I will grow to be if I did not go on those trips during my youth – since Jr. High. Those trips opened my eyes ... and now, I know what I want for my own family ... my kids will see the world ... not thought books ... not thought TV ... not thought a computer ... but thought their own eyes.

<long sigh>

So, why am I so angry? Well, I want to respect her parents ... but at the same time, this is against my belief. I believe that it is counter productive and even harmful to overprotect one’s kids ... especially for the sake of old tradition and standards.

I guess I will have to leave her at home if I want/need to travel ... but I feel bad =(

So ... I will drop this issue ... for now ... I’m sure it will popup in the distant future.

Over the Limit

I pushed to limit ... and over ... and so I got burnt this time.

As a chameleon, I try to accommodate the needs of other ... and in doing so, I slowly lose my identity. Everyday I discover something new about myself ... and yet, I’m not sure who I am becoming. God, who am I? Who should I be?

So for now, I’m going to stop planning (tightly) ... be more spontaneous ... and let God take the driver seat...

BTW, it is amazing how news travel fast in Church ... I guess God has blessed some people with a big mouth ... (^O^)

In Love

Everyone can guess how I feel ... only two truly knows how I feel ... God and Chica <3

Fly High

This week, Chica went on her first overnight(s) business trip to Florida ... first time on her own without a chaperon ... I could image it to be very exciting. (^o^)

I just wish she call me ... as she said she will do ... to put my mind to peace.

Edit: [ She called ... yea!!! ... =D ]

Anyway, I hope Chica is enjoying her trip. =)

What is wrong?

I will not deny it anymore ... there is sometime serious wrong with me. So much to do in so little time ... I want to stop ... I’m too tire. I was hoping that I will get better ... but maybe it is just the way it shall be ... <sigh> =(

Sooooo Tire

My brain is shutting down ... super overtime burnt out ... and I think I need a 3rd monitor at work ... way too many files opened - to trace through 20 years worth of bad programming. I’m too tire to type any more ... bla ... bla ... bla ... brain dead = @_@